Day 04 — A blogger friend I’ve known for over five years told me she has been blogging anonymously all this time and most of what I know about her is her fantasy. My reaction to this news is…
What a silly (or awkwardly phrased) prompt. If what you know about a blogger friend is fantasy, then he or she isn’t an “anonymous blogger,” he or she is just not a truthful one.
For me, the whole purpose of blogging is finding a public sphere where you find it easy to be yourself. When I created this blog senior year of high school (It has been almost three years now!) my sole purpose was keeping in touch with my best friend and letting her know what was going on. That’s why she created her blog. Our whole point was to be honest and truthful and have a space where we could update each other about how life was going in our respective colleges.
To me, an anonymous blogger is one who does not disclose their life or personal details. This blogger friend from the scenario went one step further, and disclosed some sort of false personal information (Name, likes and dislikes, etc). That’s the worst kind of dishonesty, because you create a relationship with a fake persona. I don’t understand.
I think the first thing I would ask them is “Why?”
Not “why” as in “why did you do that?” but why as in “why are you telling me this now?”
Why are you telling me this now?
Is it because you realize that I’m a friend you are close enough to now that you’re ready to truly reveal yourself? Has our online friendship transcended into something that is more real for you?
I would be upset and hurt. To continue our friendship, I’d expect some honesty, especially if I’ve been honest with my blogger friend. I’m used to having online friends, if you recall my past experience with forums, so this scenario has actually taken place. There was a friend of mine who, a year later, came out to me and showed me real pictures of himself and told me that he had been posting pictures of a friend of his until then on the forums. But I helped him regain his confidence and showed him that he could be honest about himself online and we would offer no judgments. Once he knew that, he began being more honest and I think it was a really liberating experience for him.
It’s truly something when you can be exactly who you are, and people still like you, talk to you, trust you, love you.
It’s lovely to create a fantasy persona, but even then, it’s all coming from somewhere. This blogger friend of mine may actually live in Suburban Long Island rather than Las Vegas, but something about her writing style and fantasies should already have told me a lot about who she is. (Yes, the blogger friend became a girl somewhere along the way)
Do you know what I mean? If she is honest and upfront with me, even if it was five years in the making, my reaction would be to help her understand that she could blog about her fantasies, be herself, and still be accepted.
Please take a moment to check out the other wonderful blogs participating in 30 days of Blogging Honesty with me!
- Cherlyn Cochrane
- Tom Baker
- Sylvia Garza
- Everything L&L
- Princesa’s Academy
- Tempting Sweets: Story Heats
- The Orange Wit
- Every Girls’ Corner
- Sleep and Salami
- It’s Just Me
- Sin Sex Lust Love
- The Past to the Present
- My Kaleidoscope