That’s right! I refuse to give into the cutesy Hallmark Holiday that is Valentine’s day. Just one week to go and I’m already sick of all of the lovey-dovey mushiness that is surrounding me. All the couples in love and happy and caring about each other.
You know just once, I’d like to have a Valentine’s Day that consists of a male in my life who likes me. I’ve never been the target audience for Valentine’s Day. Never been in a relationshi(t) on Vday. Always single. Even the one time I had a boyfriend over two years ago, he broke up with me in the beginning of January and we never spoke again. Even when we were in school all semester after that and lived in the same dorm building. Eep, awkward, right.
But right now, I’m not painting my nails all pink with cute holographic hearts all over them. I’m not pining away and hoping to meet somebody special, and I’m certainly not expecting any gifts. No chocolates, hearts, flowers, dates, or fancy dinners are in my cards this year. I don’t foresee them being in my future either 😦I always get a little sad when February comes around 😦 That’s all, I guess.
It’s because I’ve wanted a relationship for so many years. Maybe if I had one good long-term relationship, I’d know the pros and the cons and want it less? But I think I have the personality that gets attached and I know I would make a good girlfriend/wife someday. I like taking care of people. I’m nice andand…okay fine, I’ll save it for shaadi.com
What I’m saying is true though. I WANT A BOYFRIEND. I am not afraid to admit it. I want somebody to take care of who will take care of me. I wanna have all these lovey dovey feelings and go on a really cute romantic date for Valentine’s Day. I don’t wanna end up forever alone!
Until that dream becomes a reality, Valentine’s Day will continue to suffocate me with all of its happiness. The day singles out all of the lonely people in this world and makes them feel that much more sad, alone, and depressed. Sometimes, the lonelies will connect over the mutual loneliness they feel on Valentine’s Day, but most of that stuff is for the movies. I can’t bank on that happening for me.
I just know that love will strike unexpectedly for me. I know because I am not leaving it with any other choice. Because I’m beginning to believe and expect that there is nobody out there who will fall in love with me on his own. I’ve waited and wanted for so many years and I’ve been let down every single time. So I hope you guys will excuse me for no longer expecting to find love.
Arranged marriage, that topic that fascinates me oh-so-much, sounds more and more appealing by the day. Gods, I hate this month.