I’ve forgotten how to blog!

I’ve spent so much time just living these past few weeks (Okay fine, maybe months) that I’ve turned into such a bad blogger.

I’m not even upset at how infrequently I’ve posted, but I really miss having the motivation and desire to post. Hell at one point, I was so passionate about this. It was like in the back of my head, every memory I made and event I participated in, I could spin it into a blog post.

It was kinda amusing – the voice inside my head would narrate my life in beautiful sentences complete with witty anecdotes and a humorous writing style.

If you’ve been blogging for a while, you have to know exactly what I mean. That phenomenon when you bite into dinner only to look up and see your waiter slip on a banana peel and think to yourself “Oh man, this is going to make a helluva good story.” And once you’ve thought that, its almost like you’ve begun writing the sentences in your head.

Am I alone over here?

I used to feel that way ONCE UPON A VERY LONG TIME, and now that feeling is gone. I am nostalgic for those days, when I found it so much easier to just write out all of my thoughts here instead of letting them fester.

I guess maybe a part of that is because I started Controlled Derangement with the intent of keeping it personal but then through participating in writing competitions and events (ie. Poetry Paradise or Blogging Honesty), I really lost the ability to keep this a proviate blog.

Although Nabila is still my most avid reader, she’s no longer my only reader. So I’ve become a lot more self-conscious of what I say and how I say it. Maybe that’s taken the zest out of it for me?

I wonder to myself – who in the hell will care to know about how my day at work was today. Why would people follow my blog to read that. I’m not some president or famous person…!?

ON A MORE INTERESTING NOTE – I RECEIVED MY SECOND LAW SCHOOL ACCEPTANCE LETTER TODAY! I’ve just got to wait on a Financial Aid package now 🙂

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9 thoughts on “I’ve forgotten how to blog!

  1. *your own unique spin (this keyboard doesn’t register keys sometimes I think.. hmm~
    Seriously you gotta keep blogging, I need this website to stalk! Neeeeeddddd

  2. You’re thinking too much about it. That’s how I am a lot too, which is why I stop myself from making twitter statuses & facebook statuses when I had it because I felt that no one would actually care. But a blog post is different, you have you own unique spin on things & can make it funny or serious or anything. So I think you should forget about what others think and just write! I’m sure you other readers agree with me on this but it’s really fun reading what you write about things! It doesn’t matter if you’re not famous; you are to me~ I don’t care what a celebrity ate for breakfast, but I’m happy to catch up with you about breakfast XD

    • Haha awww that’s so sweet ❤ Don't worry my blog isn't going anywhere!! It's the most consistent thing of my life after law school lawlz.

      You are right, I shouldn't overthink it. The problem is just that I am able to air out less of my dirty laundry with a larger audience and I am the type who will burst with the news unless I share it with someone.

      • Your followers are really quiet though!…You know you’d be really good at bloggy youtube videos, have you ever thought of that?! LIke I’d bet you’d get millions of views!And you don’t really have to edit those either, just webcam real quick and post..

      • I think I have “followers” as far as the official statistic goes, but not people who actually follow the blog. I mean I use an RSS feed (bloglovin.com) to ‘follow’ blogs, so even though I follow people on wordpress by clicking the button, I never look at that feed.

      • ohh yeah you told me.. I just use the wordpress app on my phone and when I’m bored check it out or just look at the reader in wordpress.. used to not work for me but now it does and it’s ok haha. But I’m impressed, you almost have 200 followers! 😀

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